How Do We Raise Students' Self-Esteem?

Parents are the first line of teachers in students' lives.

Two Sides of a Coin: Building self-esteem in students can be harmful or helpful, depending on how it is done. It is possible to build students up so that they become "puffed up" and think they are awesome just for showing up for school. 

A Saturation of Praise

One can make students think they are awesome no matter how they perform.

Researchers found that "D" students do not necessarily think less highly of themselves than "A" students. Bullies often have over-inflated "self-esteem."

"When self-esteem is not based on personal drive, accomplishments, or positive behavior, it resembles narcissism" (Aspen 2001-2009).

Building True Self-Esteem 

Students with higher self-esteem do better in school (Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs)

"Practices that promote self-esteem produce more successful, hard working, risk-taking, ambitious, respectful, and self-directed students" (Schindler, 2010).

John Schindler writes that true self-esteem has little to do with feelings reported by students. Instead, it has everything to do with a set of unconscious self-beliefs that include "one's thoughts about one's ability to control their world" (locus of control), "one's likability, and one's sense of competence or self-efficacy."

To help improve student's locus of control:

·      Give students voice and ownership of rules and their consequences

·      Create an environment free from excuses.

·      Teach problem-solving skills

·      Give students choices

·      Use behavioral contracts when needed

To help students develop a sense of belonging or acceptance

This is essential for mental health and ability to trust and take risks.

·      Create an environment of acceptance (model, teach, attitudes and values)

·      Appreciate the different viewpoints

·      Validate student's feelings

·      Promote human respect

·      Use cooperative learning where students have to lean on each other to gain certain accomplishments

Encourage Self-efficacy

·      Give students specific feedback about what they need to work on and what they did well

·      Assess using a clear criterion

·      Find ways to make students teachers

·      Help students make their own goals

·      Help students think of ways to overcome their own barriers

·      See students through to achieve their goals.

Example: A student wants to do a large assignment. Help the student decide what they can do in a specific amount of time. Break the work up into smaller chunks and set time goals for specific days. Are there other barriers? What are they? What specific goals can we set to get over these barriers? Then follow up and keep students accountable for their goals.

Another Example: Have the students help build the class rules or home rules, keeping in mind the most valuable goals of keeping everyone safe, respecting each other, and learning as a priority. 

Aspen Education Group. Can Your Teen Have Too Much Self-Esteem? Found on http://www.aspeneducation.com/Article-too-much-self-esteem.html. 2001-2009.

Shindler, J. V., Creating a Psychology of Success in the Classroom:

Enhancing Academic Achievement by Systematically Promoting Student Self-Esteem. http://www.calstatela.edu/faculty/jshindl/cm/Self-Esteem%20Article%2011.htm

Two great books on teaching students to make good choices:
Cline, F. & Fay, J. Parenting with Love and Logic: Teaching Children Responsibility.  2006.
Fay, J. & Funk, D. Teaching with Love and Logic: Taking Control of the Classroom. 1995.